I'm at work and pretty much sick of doing Dental Ass. homework. and there's hardly anybody coming in today- i really wish i brought my "Sacred Romance" book by John Eldredge...He's great as a writer,..he makes things VERY personal, you can connect with it as a reader.
i brushed my hair for the first time in over a week last night...and the growling little rats were revolting as i was pulling them from my hair~! Yeah, they think they can build little nests in my hair and stay there or something!- what the heck, who do they think they are? so, my hair isn't really that full right now...i think i brush the curl out every time i brush my hair, so i don't wanna brush it that much!
But i was tempted to just let it dread up on it's own...but i'm faced with the reality that i hafta get a "grown up-s" job someday..so i shouldn't do it. oh dreams of dreams...

i'm just kinda chillin' right now, wishing somebody was online so i could either chat or email or something...I had a good lunch- Mushroom Parmesan Ravioli, with some sorta creamy sauce on the top! it was sooo good!
Yesturday when i was at Oryana- i saw Olivia! she's like my cousin, kinda- cousin in law? i guess. but she's Josh's sister- my long-lost cousin's sister...and well, we talked- and Josh is in Texas and he's thinkin' about moving back home- and living off the land with his sister and her husband...it'll rock. cuz they have like 10 acres of land, and they're making a garden and stuff. that was my dream right there. to have a kind of commune- living together in harmony with the Lord and producing all our needs by just living off the land- and ofcourse, going to buy the things we need to get. like the front of my journal cover that i decorated- with that picture, of the guy holding' the sheeps' horn and his wife- holding the bundle of sheep's wool and they look like they're just backcountry livin' kinda folk. that's awesome.

But i guess I am who I am. I'm nothing else.
not to say my dreams WON'T come true- but i am who i am now becuz of life and what the Lord has done in my life up to this point. It's still awesome...it's still all good.
i'm happy.
ciao
bella

i found this journal entry that i wrote- in my little book, worthy to type in here...
Sept. 10 2004
1 day till the towers fell years ago.
"we are living in prophetci times, "- said Eric at work. And i know, i desperately know what he's talking about.
adn i pray for the hope inside of meto not die, to hold onto the reigns of victory which will be leading me into the Kings court, The Kings palace.

I hope that anyone who would read this would look to the LORD in desperate times and know that He WILL SAVE YOU. Just believe in HIM alone, Jesus the Christ, Jeshua Mishea.
Jeremiah 29:11-14
vs. 12"The you will call upon me and come and pray to Me and I will listen to you."
13 "You will seek ME and find me when you search for em with all your heart."
14 "I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and I will restore your fortunes and will gather you..."
** Becuz the LORD was wanted. Becuz there was some soul left in the world that wanted and desired and sought out the Heavenly Father: somebody that looked at everything around themselves and said "I don't want any of this stuff- I want the LORD": somebody that KNEW...those seldom few who REALLY know, who really hunger and thrist for righteousness. Those warriors.
The fire is shut up in their bones.
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That is all what i wrote in my journal...and becuz it's somewhat of a revelation that God has shared with me..i decided it would be good to type in here.
As i was typing all that- i had a baby kitty inside my overalls, resting against my belly- and it just made me want to have a baby! little Ziggy was all purring and stuff...whenever i am pregnant, i will have overalls...TONS OF THEM...and i will sing to my baby (not just in the shower) i will dance slowly, outside, in the grass, to music that only my baby and I can hear.
OH. it will be love...it surely will be love.
Meanwhile, the LORD is developing mommy-type skills within me and is refining me everyday- every month i pray that i would notice and learn the different things that I DON'T know about...before that beautiful day comes.

it's just been soo busy lately and blogging is getting to where I'll only have a moment, and hafta get back to doing something.
Well, ciao for now...
apes

"Took the way home that leads back to sullivan street,..."
- Counting Crows
this song sings about him driving by this girls house- that he loves, but can never really get out of his car to go up to the door and ask her out- but he always takes the way home that leads back to sullivan street, cuz it takes him by her house...

I've just bought the book "The Sacred Romance" by John Eldridge...he's great...and i hope this book revolutionizes my way of thinking once more, in a new way, about Jesus. and it brings me to the heart of God once again. already, while reading that book, quite a few times I've had to just set my eye lids down slowly and breath in what the Holy Spirit was giving me for that moment in reflection. good book for sure.

i'm currently being loved on by kittys! Draco and Ziggy. old and young, a relaxed, settled spirit in comparison to a young, vibrant playful spirit...they should be together.

I'm convinced that's why it's a good thing for old people to live in the same house as youngsters- like when my papa get's old, i'd like to live in the same house as him- or have him live with us...husband and I, hopefully we'll have a big enough house. Cuz, it in a way keeps the older people young inside and shows the younger ones how the old people are. That's why it's bad that grandpas and grandma's are shoved off to the side. Becuz the reality of life is gone, the reality that death can happen isn't that real to the little ones....or to you as their daughter/son.
I hope that it'll work out where i can have my papa live with me- and that we have a big house.

but ciao for now,
apes