well, it's June finally. I never thought the sun would come!
But it has. But with some rain clouds attached, with some bad news.
Sean is gay. and i didn't believe it at first. i can't. he likes girls. and i'm not convinced that this is how God made his child. he made him how he is suppose to be and Satan is messing with him...so needless to say i cried all last night, at work, on the way home, and at home...i just didn't know what to tell him. But i hafta tell him that I love him no matter what, just what I told kimmy- and He'll know that's because God loves him no matter what, and will continue to pursue him no matter what he does...I know how much this hurts...well, i got a little tiny bit of how it hurts God's heart. and i'm just like sad everytime i think about it. cuz well, the world is sooo filled with SIN and God is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo filled with MERCY AND GRACE!!!!!!! which overcomes all sin and all of everything and the whole world..and so it doesn't send me fearing the sin....it sends me back to the feet of my savior, Jesus, who I see in the light of His grace towards the WHOLE WORLD....with his blood, dying with a loud scream "I LOVE YOU!!!!!" and our sin was paid for in full. God is just sooo good...i can't fathom it enough...all the sin in the world, and He COVERED it all, in one day, at one time in History, even for Adam and Eve! It just renewed my hope in Him and my joy for His salvation to COME to all the EARTH, and to the Jews and Gentiles (like the Germans) alike, who worship the ONE and ONLY...Jesus Christ...

Oh, in the midst of all this, brandi is baCK! yes! and she brought me a straw-corn husk hat thingy back! i was so greatful, but i don't think i told her so...enough anyways. We definately go to hang out, I haven't called her yet, and ya think i would've by now, eh? Right.
I'm working on Ms. Lee's paper tonight, well, this morning, cuz it's like 2:15 am., and i"m just praying as i type it, cuz i just really need His grace to get it done, cuz i'm just not focused and i'll sit there not knowign what to type...
I changed my Major also.....to Missions, and i really feel like that is totally God and well, I also still feel like this year ...coming up- I'll be going back to Israel, to lean Hebrew as a Second Lang. and to study the Old Testament...and well, to walk around the Old City in Intercession everyday...if that would be possible. Cuz i feel like God is going to minister to His people...the Jews....i always thought abotu namign a child Israel..that would be a really cool name...and i could use it for a girl or a boy!....Israel Louise..Israel Victoria, Israel Rose....hmm. Or for a boy....Israel Otis, Israel Samuel, Israel Daniel, Israel Isaiah....I've always liked the name Isaiah...for a son....yeah.
well, enough of that. I need to go to bed.
sweet spring song