Maybe i shouldn't have begun this morning with Sprite and the 12 Monkey's movie. It seriously ruined the day i think. Cuz i just really sat around, and did nothing. Got up at 10:00- but was awake about 8:30- watched that movie, got lunch. finished movie and went back to bed, to sleep the day away. sadly enough.
i could've almost forgotten i was in China, if i didn't leave my room. shoot. why did i hafta leave.
i slept, and it was pretty long, 2 and half hours, i think. So, i woke up around 5:00 for sure, and i made myself get up, cuz i won't be able to sleep tonight < i thought.
and Alex was on, so i chatted with him for a bit. and he said i sounded like i was depressed..a.nd i said yeah, cuz there's nobody over here to talk to- even the american dude over here from Washinton, Brian,..doesn't even talk to me...they're all secluded...like don't like to say much to me. At least my students want to hang out with me. But that kinda sucks after a while, cuz they dont' know what I'm saying some of the time and i hafta repeat things...which is hard to even make a friend. But Jeannie, the one i'm gonna do the song with- she's definately a sweetie. She's helped me hold onto God, when it was tough, and encourage me....and i'm not even sure if she believe in Jesus. Every time I talk about Him to her, i feel as though i have no place to. Cuz here I am-- falling apart at the seams in my faith-- and I'm talking to her about God's love, even why I myself am questioning it. When i don't need to. that is what's humbling. He's still uses me, even when I am shaking in my faith in Him. I dont' understand. I'm falling apart here! I can't stand! I dont' even have a regular quiet time anymore. It's worse than before I left the USA, being here.
MY lower back is killing me. I wonder if it needs to get cracked. And i'm really hoping that Sharron will be able to give me some medicine soon, cuz my skin is seriously breaking out. I knew autumn wasn't gonna do it for me. Some times ...man, She's just really annoying...and she thinks she's normal...like she's not annoying. There's nothing wrong with her. right chucky. I kinda miss her i think. She's getting really cool camping stuff and that kinda makes me mad, cuz i wanna get good camping stuff. better tent for sure and camping equipment- like stove, pots, warm clothes that are good for the cold, ...i dont' know. I should plan a heavy duty hike when i get back, i wanna get outside.

I will go now. Holding onto the hope of that last blog i typed, yesturday.
sweet spring song.