"i don't mind standing everyday,
out on the corner in the pouring rain...
look for the girl with the broken smile,
ask her if she wants to stay awhile.."
- Maroon 5

I'm currently reading Every Woman's Battle - by Shannon Ethridge: it's really good so far.
kinda of revealing and insightful- but to a scary point.
a point i don't wanna face.
How does anyone know that they ready for a relationship??
HOW will i know that i am ready?
maybe- i think- when God finally brings HIM into my life- that MEANS i'm ready.
maybe He does thi- this waiting time- to MAKE me see that there's need in my life/heart for something. that i'm lacking. Until i have Jesus living in me- which I do right now- I am lacking with out him.
and that God created me for relationship.
1. Firstly for HIM
2. Then for others'.

man i get so confused sometimes- about if i'm doing the right thing, or if i'm at the right place, or if i am missing HIM.
i worry too.
about the end days...
i was taking a shower the other morning, waking up from some weird dream and a phrase just entered my head-
"There will be a great falling away"
and as i pondered this and the origin of this phrase...i was wondering if it really was the word of God.
and this scared me. cuz many will say they are apart of the body of Christ- but want everyone to accept their sin as 'alright'- or 'okay'- and i'm afraid. I don't wanna be one of those people.
i wanna kick the habit of sin..the disease of sin in my life.
i wanna be righteous ...
but WHAT IS ONE TO DO ----- when they can't fight on their own anymore..a.nd there's nobody in sight when you think yer slowly sinking down?
what am i to do?
when i think my life saver isn't there-
"someone throw me a rope,
woven with the rounds of history,
something i can believe in."
- 100 Portraits

creation groans, like in childbirth...
it's in waiting also.
i guess i'm not the only one...