"most folks smile away the blues...i mean, i guess they do..."
- waterdeep "to chase away the birds"

i'm hangin' out at my friend- Clayton's- place, and it's cool, cuz we got stuff to catch up on and i'm just chillin' diggin on some tunes.
totally HAPPY!! for reals. being home has totally changed my attitude about life and stuff- more like it's gotten me back on track with the lord and stuff, and that's what matters most, right?TOTALLY. and i'm totally stoked to see friends from work- especially Brianna-i think the Lord is like a blood hound on her tail. Cuz she's totally KNOWN the Lord like anyother believer, but has fallen so hard and it's really hard for her to get back up. i mean, i think the Lord totally wants to have her all to himself and just spend some good one on ONE time with her. And show her how it's REALLY SUPPOSE TO BE. how guys should REALLY TREAT HER. oh man. i don't even feel like i should be talking here cuz i've been living in denial. like i really don't deserve any better than what i've had. like i'm really doing "fine" with the Lord when i'm not...when i'm TOTALLY not. Man.
the things we try to convince ourselves of. the life we start to "accept" becuz the world (or satan?) has tried so hard to make it seem like the Lord doesn't have any better for us. Man. the stupid pit of despair we crawl into....or fall into? or jump into? the hopeless pit that satan drags us into....
WE DON'T BELONG THERE! WE DON'T NEED THAT CRAP! WE CAN HAVE SOOO MUCH MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THERE'S SOOO MUCH.....SO MUCH MORE THAT IS WAITING FOR US....LINGERING....ANTICIPATING....YEARNING....
that God has for us. happiness, joy, peace, love, patience, kindness....blessings beyond what you would think are capable....and not selfishness....not a selfish love, but a humble, totally sweet love.
oh amen ....
amen.